AAA Batteries Anyone?

So I'm driving between Montgomery and Mobile and a truck passes me, clearly because I was obeying all posted speed limits as I always do and he was not. Granted the limit I observe may not be exactly posted on the section of the pavement that I am currently traveling but its like they say, it's always 70 somewhere. So I gaze over at the truck and see the name and motto of the business on the side - AAA Batteries - Delivered and Installed.

This makes me quite curious. The business has to pay for the nice truck, the gas and all and I just can't see how there can be that much demand for that type of a service, especially in this economy. Who calls them, I wonder? How many people are there in the greater Alabama area who either can't find the little screwdriver one needs to open the battery compartment on kid's toys or household appliances or just can't match up that little cross thing on the battery with the little cross thing on the powerless object? Really, even I can open up the camera, kid's toy, remote control and other appliance essentials without assistance and get those little buggers in them. And, if they don't work, I have enough smarts to dump them out and reverse them. And, don't most devices use the AA variety anyway?

I ponder what these same folks might do if their garbage disposal quits working like ours did the other evening thanks to the sacrificial offering of a Popsicle stick by a member of my family who is over 40 and is not me. I'm thinking panic at the disco type of breakdown for sure. Now I, of course, handled it like a parent who recognizes their duty to effectively and responsibily teach home maintenance to their children should.

First, I emphatically ordered the kids to stand far, far away from the grinding machine to watch a pro at work. I inserted my hand into a plastic Walmart bag, raised it above my head and announced, for great effect, "I'm going in. No one move" figuring I could always get my hand out of the grinder faster than either of them could even get near a power switch since they were standing plastered against the far wall "for their own safety." I extracted the somewhat ground up wood with the flourish of a surgeon, held the stick up like a trophy for the kids to see and then disengaged my hand from the bag, reset the machine with the little red button on the bottom and voila, after two attempts, it began to purr. The kids jumped up and down and cheered - Aidan because he was frankly quite impressed that I fixed the thing and Mia because she likes to jump up and down and yell just for the heck of it, no reason necessary. I then suggest that one of them consider a career as a plumber as I believe that will save me quite a bit of money down the road. Or a doctor. Or both.

But, as usual, I digress. After about 25 minutes of pondering what percentage of the population has battery issues, how many of them would then call a service and how that service has been impacted by the current state of the economy I then decide that the business must just be a cover for something else. Surveillance? Drug running? Who knows but it must be interesting. And then, the lightbulb goes on. Car batteries. They deliver and install car batteries and wanted to be listed first in the phone book.

Well, at least it occupied me for a good 40 minutes.