Pizza Guy was almost a Casualty

I don't know who invented those car shopping buggies that look like cars and are best described as the RVs of the grocery store. It had to be a former Kroger or Publix employee with an ax to grind. They really are that bad. Yesterday, I went to build a Habitat House. I felt all of my 94 years going up and down that ladder all day. Not a pretty sight, especially from below. But, as usual, I digress.

So, after the build, my son and I go to the grocery store via Subway which is completely catty-corner from Kroger. We ate and sorted coupons. Life was good. Walking to the Krogerb we found one of those car behemoths in the corner of the lot so Aidan got a ride all the way back to the store. We then prepared for the grocery battle by scrubbing the car thing down with a multitude of saniwipes which are nicely provided at the front door. With alarm, we then realized we had no coupons. So, apparently quite fatigued from the build and not thinking straight, I decided it would be a great idea to give Aidan a ride around the perimeter of the entire lot back to Subway to go coupon hunting. Gravity being what it is, we picked up some serious speed going down one of two hills on the way but lost speed going up one which was a little steeper and caused me to curse the behemoth manufacturer and his mother in no uncertain terms. We found the missing coupons at Subway and began our celebration of the same by turning the RV thing around and starting down the steep hill, all the while whooping for effect as it has been proved that enthusiasm actually causes objects to accelerate. And it gets going. And going. As my feet are doing an impression of the Roadrunner trying to get away from Wiley Coyote, the door to the pizza joint at the bottom of the hill opens and the pizza guy, holding pizzas up in one arm, begins a perilous exit into our path. We are hollering and I can only think of one thing. Lawsuit. Big ugly lawsuit. So we scream louder. And louder. We narrowly miss the guy who gives us his best "they don't pay me enough for this crap" look. So, if your pizza was stuck to the box yesterday, we send our apologies.